I have 35 days until I should get my surgery date. Sept 22nd I go for my psych evaluation, blood doctor, and meeting with the surgeon. I am not too worried about the psych evaluation. I think he will see that I have a really good understanding of the surgery and what I need to do after the surgery. I am open minded to everything, and I even want to continue to see a therapist after the surgery. I think it is important to do this so I can work on my emotional eating. I have really cut it out, but there are still those times that I just want a big cookie or cupcake. I think that is natural but I need to work on the better choices. I find myself looking at ingredients when I go to the store and asking myself if I REALLY need that. I am doing well, and I am very proud of myself for it. I find myself putting things back that I know I shouldn't eat. I am almost at 2 months with no soda. Seriously, I never thought I would ever ever ever get to say that. I was a huge soda drinker and I figured out just by stopping the soda I cut out at least 800-1000 calories a day. I know what ya'll are thinking, and yes that was a lot of soda! It just adds up soo fast. I mean in one 12oz can of Coke is 120 calories. I was drinking BIG glasses of soda...and I know that was well over 12 ozs at a time. Scary. I can't wait til I can say I haven't had soda in 1 year. That is going to be my lifetime accomplishment! haha.
I have to go to a blood doctor to get cleared for surgery also. This is another thing that kinda of scares me. Without getting too into it (if you have any questions please ask, I just don't feel like writing the whole story out right now) but anyway, a month after I had my son I developed a Pulmonary Embolism and DVT...almost died. Scary stuff, so I am going to have to be on blood thinners after surgery. Not everyone has to do this, but since my background my surgeon is taking every precaution and making sure I leave on blood thinners just to make sure I do not develop clots. One of my worst fears is this doctor not clearing me for surgery. I would honestly understand if she didn't clear me. I would be heartbroken though. I am not letting that fear get to me, because I think that she will. I think it is good that my surgeon is sending me to her though, that way he knows how much thinners to give me and what I should leave the hospital on and how long I need to be on them. No biggie. At least I hope its not a biggie.
So, after all that my biggest hurdle is going to get approved by my insurance. With my history of clots and now sleep apnea, I hope they take all this into consideration. The clots are common especially in obese people. I hope that my insurance will see that my chances of getting another clot will go down if my weight does. I also hope they see that my sleep apnea could go away from weight loss. All this is in my favor...I just hope it is that easy. Like I have always said in my blog, I will fight for my life. I have not went through this 6 months for nothing. I am learning so much from this...my life is changing. The way I am eating is not only changing for the better but the way my husband and son are eating are changing also. This is such a good thing that I am doing for myself and us as a family. I feel so good about my decision. Of course I have the normal fears, and I am sure once I get a date and approved for the surgery I am going to have many more fears...if I didn't then I would be scared. I am more excited for this life change. It has already began, but I want that surgery to be over with and I want to see the progress.
I wonder what I will look like as my layers start melting?